


Burying Nightmares + Desi

by EWM



Series: Comfortember (myfirstone!!) [3]
Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016) Whump, Angus and Desi, Emotional Whump, Gen, Poor Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:08:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27426961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EWM/pseuds/EWM
Summary: A little one shot on the aftermath of 4x10. I was thinking about the comfortember prompt day3 - Nightmare and this is one came out. Should I expand it?? (another one Mac and Riley shippers should stay away from I think). Sorry it's so late!!
Relationships: Angus MacGyver & Desiree "Desi" Nguyen, Angus MacGyver & Matilda "Matty" Webber (MacGyver TV 2016)
Series: Comfortember (myfirstone!!) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1996306
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13
Collections: Comfortember 2020





	Burying Nightmares + Desi

When Mac came home with Desi after his little sojourn in his own head, it was particularly satisfying. The nightmare was finally over! Well not quite, the battle for Codex and the weapon was still coming. But for now, all of that could wait. Desi was relieved to have Mac back if not entirely himself at least smiling again. Both of them decided to put reality aside for a while that night and just lock onto each other. Mac settled himself on his deck and stared at the sunshine and then the stars coming up, after a little while Desi joined him, they didn’t say anything, they just sat and enjoyed each other’s company. Later in the evening Desi made him soup for dinner (her own way of coping with stress). Mac kissed Desi and smelled the soup. He was finally back, after the nightmare of Codex, of being lost in his own head for one too many hours. He was home, surrounded by warmth and comfort and family. Desi always made him feel safe, if he wrapped his arms around her, he could push away the pain and the worry and feel fine. She presented him with a compass, and he laughed

 _“Hey Mac, you’re not lost!”_ Desi said taking his face in his hands.

He pulled her in for a long kiss and grinned, he was happy. Eventually they came up for breath and she turned back to their dinner. Mac smiled, purring contentedly to himself. But then he looked out of the window and saw him , the figure he so desperately wanted to forget…. himself. Dressed in black, his own blue eyes smudged with dark circles stared back at him, he smiled…and then was gone. Mac felt something horrible inside, some twisted sick feeling in his stomach. He felt his chest tighten, the nightmare lived on, it was still there in his head, behind his eyes. To think that his mind had produced that, that monster, so cold blooded and cruel, to think murdering people was fine, to side with Codex, it disgusted Mac at his core.

Mac woke up in a cold sweat that night, breathing hard. His twin staring down at him from the other end of the bed. When Desi asked what was wrong, he couldn’t explain it her, his guilt, his pain, his worry and the fact that he was basically seeing things. Instead he kissed her, he ran his hands all over her, determined to lose himself in her. Desi happily responded, she loved being with Mac and sometimes talking didn’t do the trick and she frankly wanted to escape her own worries too. She loved feeling close to him, feeling his hands on her, his skin always faintly smelling of cologne, his soft blond hair. He liked her scent too, not perfumed exactly, but she always smelled just faintly of soap. He felt connected to all of Desi, she truly was his escape from the world. As long as he could rap his arms around Desi, the earth and all it’s troubles could be kept at bay, even if it was only for a few hours at a time.

This wasn’t the last time his phantom self would appear. Mac saw him when slept, the figure smiling at him once again, repeating the same arguments over and over. Sometimes Mac saw him when he worked, he would look up and his mirror self would be sitting crossed legged opposite him still staring. Sometimes he could even see him in the briefing room ‘listening’ to Matty. Mac felt like some part of his brain was going mad, crumbling. He didn’t tell anyone any of this. He didn’t want to worry Bozer or Riley or Desi, Russ he didn’t trust and Matty well, Matty he knew would take him out of the game if she thought he couldn’t handle it.

So Mac buried his nightmare, he buried it deep inside, hoping and praying that it wouldn’t come out again and that he wouldn’t have to face it (of course he was wrong).


End file.
